Blessing Adesiyan on Becoming a Mom in College
Tell us about your journey to motherhood.
I became a mother my senior year of college. It felt really daunting. I was wrapping up my degree in Chemical Engineering from the University of Florida and hauling a newborn around campus. I was very fortunate to have a wonderful support system at home, school, and work (part-time). My daughter was the motivation I needed to finish strong and I did.
Did you always want to have three children? Do you want more?
I come from a big family. I have nine siblings, so you can imagine how much I did not want to have kids growing up. I felt like everywhere I turned there was a baby crying. It came as a surprise to everyone that I chose to have a baby so early. I believe everyone just assumed since I was ambitious and driven, that I would wait to have kids. My three children are a blessing to our family and if we are fortunate enough to have one more, we will be absolutely thrilled.
What are your thoughts on child spacing and age between siblings?
I honestly don’t have much thought around spacing because I never really gave that much thought. Currently, my first daughter is 11, my son is two and a half and my second daughter is almost one. After my first daughter, I spent more time focused on my career, nurturing my relationships and network. When it became clear that if I wanted to have more kids before 35, I’d have to start sooner rather than later, I went back to work. My two youngest kids are 20 months apart and it's been a roller-coaster ride managing babies and toddlers. Ultimately, I think everyone should do what is right for them in the season they are in.
How long did it take you to get pregnant each time? What did you do to increase your chances of pregnancy?
My first daughter was a welcomed surprise and so was my second daughter. My son was planned, and we fortunately got lucky on the first try. Clearly, I know nothing about preparing for pregnancy, but I truly believe that every pregnancy is purposeful and every child is so desperately wanted. I feel so honored to have conceived every single one of my children, and to be their mother. We are currently trying for baby number four, and let me tell you, this is the first time we are actually using the word trying because it's been three months and I get a sinking feeling every time I see the “not pregnant” line. I am almost sure it’s nothing since I am still breastfeeding my one-year-old daughter but it’s still deeply painful, and I cannot imagine what other women who go through multiple fertility treatments feel. It makes me want to hug every woman in the world. Women go through a lot, and we need all the support, love, and care that the world has to offer.
What is Mother Honestly, and how did your journey lead you to founding this platform?
Mother Honestly is a platform that is reimagining how women thrive in motherhood, work and life. Through our podcast for smart and ambitious working mothers, multiple sold-out conferences and social media presence, we reach women with the message that they can lead healthy, fulfilled and productive lives in motherhood. After my second child was born, I was missing that community that catered to women who wanted to be exceptional parents but also wanted to live out their dream and purpose in this world. I decided to do something about it, and here we are two years later reaching over 300,000 mothers globally. It’s truly one of my greatest accomplishments.
Last question: what advice do you have for other aspiring mamas?
You are more than enough. You are going to have an amazing journey into motherhood, enjoy every moment of it because you will miss it. Motherhood is beautiful, it is challenging, it is a rollercoaster of emotions on a daily basis, but it will make you stronger in every facet of your life.