image bio

Today only: Get 20% off Breastfeeding Essentials with code FLASH3. Shop now ➔

Home > Learn > Stories > >Candace Wohl on Pregnancy as a Gift

Candace Wohl on Pregnancy as a Gift

Nov 05, 19 4 min
Candace Wohl on Pregnancy as a Gift - Natalist

Tell us a little about yourself.

I write. I advocate. I have a close relationship with an ultrasound wand.

You can follow me on Instagram @ourmisconception and learn more at Our Misconception.

What brought you to where you are now? Bring us along from the beginning.

When I closed my eyes, I imagined I would have one of those “too much wine” nights. The ones where you break out the slow jam mix list, and you opt for lace over the ol’ cotton comfies. Then a few weeks later, I am staring down at the sight of double lines on a pregnancy test. I imagined waddling over to a maternity section in the store and trying everything in my power to sausage myself into a pair of elastic banded pants. If I squint really hard, my imagination would take me to the hospital labor room where I pushed, threatened possible bodily harm to any passersby, ending with the crescendo of that sweet glorious cry of our baby.

The reality of infertility. Instead, my reality was, best forgo that crazy wine night because alcohol decreases fertility, so they say. That slow jam mix made my eye twitchy since it had been played out of favor over the past seven years of trying to get pregnant. Lace? WTF is that? It ended with a bucket filled with negative pregnancy tests, IVF IOUs, and the beginning stages of uterine cancer. Those images in my head of what was supposed to be, became just a story tale in my imagination after my hysterectomy.

Wait, that’s super sad and kind of depressing, right? Perspective. Not having that choice opened up new ones I had previously shut down and forever dismissed as being a direct pathway to parenthood. We tried adoption. I’ll spare the details, but it didn’t work for us at the time. In that process though, someone approached us about becoming a surrogate (gestational carrier) for us. We had two remaining frozen embryos from our bajillion past IVFs (seven and counting), and we took a chance.

Surrogacy was something that was miles off from our “this is us” radar. It is muddy, unexpected, and beautiful all tossed into a blender and served best, shaken not stirred. In terms of Facebook status, most of the time I would choose the “it’s complicated” option to describe it because as beautiful as it is, let’s be honest it can be just that, beautifully complicated.

Tell us about your partner. What made you want to start or grow a family together?

Rocket scientist by day, trophy husband by night. He too writes and advocates about all things broken plumbing. He also has an endless supply of dad jokes now that he is parenting after infertility.

Figuring out when to being starting a family was easy...he had a brain tumor. Hanging out in the waiting room of a OR a few too many times has a way of putting things into perspective, namely family building. Life is short; we wanted to have a family. We just didn't think it would be the unsurmountable challenge that it was.

Shop Pregnancy Tests ⟶

What was your journey to parenthood like?

It was the definition of insanity. Doing the same thing over and over again, hoping for a different outcome. We all have our limits. We all have that one last straw that can break you. Infertility was that. Some how, despite the obstacles, we persisted. The gist, it took over a decade and way more zeros on the end of numbers than I would like to count. Oh, and two pretty amazing women who tagged in to help carry our babes. Thank God for surrogacy.

 What was happening in your life when you decided to start your family?

Chris, my husband just had not one, but two major brain surgeries. That prompted us to put a major focus on family.

How did you care for yourself while trying to conceive?

Wine. Copious amounts of wine.

Kidding, kinda. Self-care is important. It's two fold, body and mind. Counseling is what the cool kids do. We were one of those couples that focused on making sure no matter how seismic the activity around us was, our foundation would be unaffected.

What experiences shaped your understanding of conception and pregnancy?

Most people think that once you decide to try to conceive, it takes one or two "too many" wine nights and BAM knocked up. Not the case for us...or for the other one in eight couples who struggle with infertility. I had a trashcan I named the bucket of disappointment. It was overflowing with negative pregnancy tests and ovulation kits. I've taken more than I care to count. When you are laser focused on conception, one tends to overly pay attention to inner workings of the birds and the bees.

Tell us how you found out you were pregnant. We'd love details!

Our first gestational carrier took a pregnancy test before our clinic beta. It was the first time I had ever seen double lines. I remember her being nervous to tell us. For our second gestational carrier, our favorite REI gave us a call that I can only describe as spaz-excitement.

What have you learned as a result of trying to get pregnant and/or being pregnant?

Pregnancy (motherhood) is a gift, not something that is given. The difficulty that people have to get there will never be lost on me.

What's your wish for women who are trying to conceive?

Access to affordable care. Fin.

Shop Products

Subscribe & Save $3.00 sticker bestseller
Magnesium Plus
4.5 star rating 72 Reviews

Magnesium Plus

Pregnancy-safe drink mix to support relaxation‡

$35 $32

Subscribe & Save $5.00 sticker bestseller
Prenatal Daily Packets
4.7 star rating 287 Reviews

Prenatal Daily Packets

Vegan prenatal daily packets

$60 $55

Subscribe & Save $3.00 sticker bestseller
Prenatal gummy vitamins
4.5 star rating 73 Reviews

Prenatal Gummies

Doctor-formulated & delicious prenatal gummies

$29 $26

sticker bestseller
Pregnancy Tests
4.7 star rating 208 Reviews

Pregnancy Tests

As low as $3.20 per test

$16

Subscribe & Save $4.00 sticker new
postnatal multivitamin supplement
4.4 star rating 5 Reviews

Postnatal Vitamin

Nutritional & energy boost for breastfeeding‡

$40 $36

Subscribe & Save $8.00 sticker save
Prenatal Vitamin and Magnesium Pregnancy-Safe Bundle
5.0 star rating 5 Reviews

Magnesium & Multi Pack

Bundle & save on top sellers

$85 $77

Subscribe & Save $15.00 sticker favorite
Trimester Pack: Prenatal Daily Packets
4.0 star rating 2 Reviews

Trimester Pack: Prenatal Daily Packets

A full trimester worth of prenatals at a great price

$165 $150

Subscribe & Save $5.00 sticker bestseller
Prenatal Daily Packets
4.7 star rating 287 Reviews

Prenatal Daily Packets

Vegan prenatal daily packets

$60 $55

sticker favorite
Women's Fertility Test Bundle
4.9 star rating 7 Reviews

Women's Fertility Test Bundle

Bundle & save $26

$205 $185

sticker bestseller
Legacy At-home Sperm Analysis
4.7 star rating 46 Reviews

Legacy At-home Sperm Analysis

Fertility analysis for him

$295

sticker save
The Test Strip Pack
4.8 star rating 32 Reviews

The Test Strip Pack

Bundle & save with our earth-friendlier test strips

$37

sticker save
TTC Essentials Bundle
4.0 star rating 2 Reviews

TTC Essentials Bundle

TTC just got more affordable

$76 $70

Reach Out, We're Here

Have questions about your order or products? For the speediest answer, check out our FAQ section. Need something else? Come find us below.

Customer Support
support@natalist.com

Press Inquiries
media@everlyhealth.com

Business & Partnerships
team@natalist.com

Affiliates + Influencers
team@natalist.com

Job Openings
Careers Page